Gratitude

5 Minutes to Change Your Day

You know how nice it is when someone sends you a text or an old-school note in the mail? It’s nothing specific except to extend that they have been thinking of you, praying for you, or just want to let you know how grateful they are for you?

It doesn’t happen often, right? In this age of technology, to receive a handwritten note from someone with a word of encouragement is so thoughtful. When it takes less than a minute to send a text, it takes much more time and preparation to write a note on a card, address the envelope, put a stamp on it, and mail it. 

My mentor used to say we have “thought notes” in our heads, but we often don’t do anything about it. A “thought note” could be when we are feeling grateful for that old friend who's been with us through thick and thin, but we don’t express our gratitude. It’s a “thought note.” We think about what we’d say, but we don’t actually say it. 

Why do you think that is? Is it a risk of being vulnerable? Or looking foolish? Or feeling too mushy? Maybe all of these excuses, or none of them. But maybe your words will brighten someone’s day, or make their week, or give them the hope they’ve been needing.

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A former teacher of mine once showed me a plastic bag he kept in his classroom stuffed with cards. These handwritten notes and cards were ones he received from parents and students throughout his years of teaching. He said when he was feeling discouraged about his job he would open the bag and read through the notes. The words of gratitude and encouragement would give him strength to stay the course. 

I want to challenge you this week. When you have a “thought note” about someone in your life, transfer it from your brain to a card. Take your gratitude for your child’s teacher, or your neighbor, or your employer, tell them about it. It will only take you 5 minutes. It could change someone’s day. It might even change your day.

Working Through Weariness

In the span of 11 weeks, my daughter married the love of her life, my mother-in-law succumbed to her lengthy battle with a disease, and my middle son graduated high school.

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If I’m honest, I’m bone-tired, friends.

The wedding was beautiful. The weather was gorgeous (for Michigan winters anyway) with the sun streaming through the stained glass windows and the groom eagerly awaiting his bride. Several of the guests described the wedding as the sweetest wedding they ever attended. My sons even sang to their sister as she danced with my husband (watch the video here). As I gazed upon my husband of 22 years leading our daughter across the dance floor, I kept thinking, “these are my people” and I was filled with overwhelming gratitude. At the end of the day my daughter said, “Mom, it was everything I ever wanted for my fairy tale wedding.” Not much else fills a mother’s heart than a happy child.

During wedding week we were able to visit my mother-in-law while she was in the hospital. It’s a miracle for all 6 of us to get together, let alone visiting my mother-in-law who’d been given a year to live five years ago. During our visit, my kids were able to tell her about their adventures of living in a new state and the challenges that came with integrating into a new culture. Toward the end of our visit, the kids blended their voices together in harmony as they sang a few of their choir songs. My dear mother-in-law, whose body was weary for this world, leaned over in her bed and allowed their sweet voices to minister to her soul. We prayed together at the end of our visit and knew that if this was the last time we see each other in this world, we would see her again in heaven. Mutual love for the Lord our God gave us hope for a reunion.

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She passed three and a half weeks later.

Grieving the death of a parent was new for my husband and I. And I wasn’t sure how to support him as he flew back and forth to take care of her before she breathed her last. We did our best having deep conversations with our kids about grief and loss and tried to help them process their emotions. Sorrow in loss is deep and cutting, but it’s the hope in healing that carried us through.

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We couldn’t stop long on the road of sorrow, because we had a son’s achievement to celebrate. As the third child to graduate high school I was fairly comfortable with throwing a graduation party, but let me tell you, it was tough. It wasn’t the planning or setting up that got to me. It was the aching feeling of utter aloneness that hit me hard. Without family support or close friends we’re still very much an island in our city. We have yet to be successful in finding a church to rally around us and help us cross the finish-line of raising our kids. So, we did the best we could and threw a party for my son and his friends. They were happy and enjoyed snacks and sodas, but for me there was a noticeable void of rejoicing with those that know us. That know our family. That know the ins-and-outs of our family dynamics.

Now that we’re through these beautifully challenging weeks, I’m bone weary. My heart is full of joy and sorrow and I hardly know which one I’ll be feeling tomorrow, but I’m determined to continue pressing on. This song, “Praise before Breakthrough,” has been on repeat on my heart and playlist for weeks as I work through my weariness.  

Now that we’re through these beautifully challenging weeks, I’m bone weary. My heart is full of joy and sorrow and I hardly know which one I’ll be feeling tomorrow.

This year is definitely one of the busiest ones for my family, but it will be okay. My husband and I decided at the beginning of this year that with so much activity (including my oldest son moving out at the end of the summer) that we just need to extend extra grace to each other as we navigate this year.

How are you extending grace to yourself, dear friend? What song is helping you pull yourself up by the spiritual bootstraps? How can I join you in prayer for the battles you’re facing? I pray you’re able to praise before your breakthrough. It will come. I just know it.

Cultivating a Heart Posture of Gratefulness

If it’s one thing that makes me roll my eyes, it’s cheesy catch-phrases. One that is overly used during this season of Thanksgiving is, “An Attitude of Gratitude.” I know, I know, it’s a good reminder, but I think I avoid it for its sheer cheesiness.

In the last few years, I’ve really worked at having not just an attitude of gratitude, but a heart posture of gratefulness.

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It sounds the same, doesn’t it?

For me, I think it’s different. I can change my attitude in the situation, but that attitude won’t necessarily affect my heart. My attitude could be merely showing the external attempt to avoid pain or embarrassment. However, a heart posture of gratefulness shows a deeper work being done within me. It shows that my words and actions stem from a source of gratitude, not just an attitude that I can adjust when the wind changes.

A heart posture of gratefulness means I’ve anchored myself in the hope of Jesus Christ and my gratitude emerges from that hope. It’s reposturing myself to not be spinning spastically with the chaos of the world around me, but to be firmly planted in hope.

If you’re wondering what this looks like in a practical sense, take a minute to be still and focus your thoughts toward Jesus and his great love for you. Anchor your heart there for a few minutes. Let the truth of His love and acceptance seep deeply into your soul. Allow thoughts of His faithfulness and truth to captivate your attention. And then begin to cultivate gratitude in your heart. Speak of the things in your life that bless you. Even the small things.

The first sip of hot coffee in the morning.

The way the sunlight dances on the clouds.

The moment of peace where you can take a breath.

For the Lord loving you when you don’t even love yourself.

For having a pillow to rest your head.

For…(you fill in the blank)

Want to take this a step further? The next time you see someone you’re grateful for, tell them. Don’t just think about it, tell them what they mean to you, write them a note of encouragement, send them a text.

I’m grateful for you, dear friend.