The other day I was getting ready to take my son to school when a woman stopped in front of our driveway and told my son something was smoking in our backyard. I was still in the house gathering my purse and keys when he told me so I scurried outside to see what was going on. I could certainly smell smoke, but our backyard is mostly the pool surrounded by fencing.
Nothing was smoking. But the landscapers in my neighbor’s yard were firing up their weed-whackers letting out streams of smoke.
But my heart was pounding as if the whole backyard was engulfed.
And my fear of losing my house in a house fire flooded my brain.
What the well-meaning woman didn’t know was that I’ve survived a house fire. She had no idea that her concern would trigger the pain from my past; the pain of loss and fear of fire that took me years to heal from.
It took me a few hours to calm my pounding heart and frightened spirit. I had to recognize what triggered my emotions was false information and replace it with the truth.
Have you dealt with that? Your day is fine and then something triggers a memory or a feeling and suddenly you’re feeling depressed or afraid. Maybe it’s an off-hand remark that reminds you of something shameful from your past and ruins your whole day. Or an image or memory that points to an emotional wound that hasn’t healed. Next time you have this try to back up the day’s events and uncover what triggered your feelings. Recognize what is real and what is false information.
Next week I’ll talk about what to do next; replacing the false information with the truth. But until then, know that you matter and your story matters.